He's the kind of guy who wouldn't give you a minute of his life.

I used to think that loyalty is the most important thing. Now, I see that loyalty has its own bag of obligations.

I may change my mind later but at this time, you know what, I can't keep my mouth shut when my heart is open. Truth sucks and it hurts.

*****************

"You don't have to justify her action."

"I'm not. I'm trying to figure out what is going on in her mind."

I seem to have the habit of "making excuses" for people whose action goes against the norm, or so it appears to some friends. In reality, I am not making excuses. I'm just trying to understand.

It upsets me when people claim that I am making justification. Well, excuse me, who died and gave you the rights to condemn everyone stupid or evil? Human's action has its reason. No one thinks that they are bad or evil. Everybody thinks they are doing the right things.

People, in general, break my heart. Honestly.

*****************

I'm sorry. Is it just me or is Superman an ash-hole. Yes, he saved the world, many times. But that is to feed his egotistical I-got-the-power narcissistic glands. I am the hero, all hail to Super-Me!

Unless it involved his status as The Man Who Saved the World, or that little saucy love interest of his, Superman would hid under the mask of the boring nobody Clark Kent. Superman, my friends, is a selfish bastid.

And need I remind you that most of Superman's "bad guys" are also Super Suckers from the Other Planets, brought to you by Superman, himself.

Then again, what the f*ck do I know about Superman?

Man, I'm in a foul mood.

I guess it's hard when you find that your superhero is actually an uncaring immature egomaniac.

I hate it when I found out that someone I admired is also a human being with all its glory and flaws. Which means they are no better than me. Which means I can be better than them. Which means I am Superior. Which means I'm being judgmental. Which means I'm also human. Which means I'm no better then them. You see where this is going?

I am a thrashing wounded animal, right now.

No kidding, you trotting ponies!

Alright, so, this might explain this morning I'm not prejudice. I hate everybody equally - including myself moment.

Today's horoscope:

You are holding on to unexpressed feelings, which is a common problem for you Crabs. Today, however, you may have to reveal what's bothering you or you could explode. Emotional intensity is pressurizing your subconscious mind and it will release one way or another. Don't wait for something to happen. Initiate conscious action as soon as you can.

The heart-centered Leo Full Moon at 12:46 am EST demands that we demonstrate our emotions while asking for what we personally need. But it may be challenging to express our warmth and generosity as we are cooled by the emotionally detached Aquarius Sun. We may want to respond spontaneously, but must also consider the social context of any situation. Additionally, mental Mercury slips into dreamy Pisces, making it even harder to communicate clearly.

*********

In other news, My lovely Lady Bug got adopted. She now have a fancy-schmancy stable with a valley view and all the hay she can eat all day. Of all my babies, Lady Bug is the most mellow. I am very happy for her.

Mister Warlock, also, is now living at the Equestrian Center to work with students. Go Casanova Warlock!

Two out of the backyard. Seven more to go.

Speaking of horses, I went to a fair and fell in love with this Sexy Friesian Stallion. If I can hook him up with my Miss Lucy. Oo-lala! What a beautiful baby it would be. And Oh.Mah.Gawd, I need one of these Norwegian Mohawk Fjord. It'd appeared that I have a closet-kink on the stalky Scandinavian-ish bad boy types, because I love the Icelandics, too. And lookie at this fuzz-ball! Now, that is Adorable, with a capital A.

I need to win the lottery so that I can go buy some land, build a climate-control indoor barn/stadium for the horses and a little shack for me. On second thought, who needs a shack. I'll just sleep in the stall, with my ponies. Yeah!

Sometimes, I think an apocalypse is exactly what mankind needed.

I just spend half-an-hour of my time arguing that the word envelope can both be pronouced en-vuh-lohp and anh-vuh-lope.

Instead of one or the other, why can't they both be right?

****

Some people make me uncomfortable. There is no agreeing to disagree. There is no room for different perspectives.

And for those people who GOT EVERYTHING figured out, I wonder why they are most likely the ones who exhibit the worst narrowed worldview.

Sometimes, I find it is much easier if I deal with people on a superficial level. If I really don't give a damn then, we all can drink to stupidity and bigotry.

And yes, when I speak of the flaws of mankind, I included myself in that flaw as well.

*********

I guessed I'm angry at myself for falling into such a trap. That was stupid of me. It's pointless. I knew it's pointless. Yet, I still engaged myself in such a debate. And then, I'm in a bad mood because I cannot get my point across. And I'm sitting here simmering in my own vexation.

Stupid, stupid.